Letter: Long term Goals with Gang Kids
Dear Deb:
I work with kids involved with gangs. They are 14 to 18 years old — going on 30. When I ask them what they want to do for a career, many say “It doesn’t mater because I’m not going to live past 25 any way.” How do I help someone who does not see a future for themselves?
Unfortunately, this is a common belief among inner-city kids today – hopelessness and anger permeates their life view. Part of our job is to give them hope – for “without hope the people will perish.” A few ideas for giving hope include:
1. Ask them to PRETEND they found a magic wand which would allow them to change their life so that they are still alive at 35 years old. Have them visualize what they would LIKE their life to be like. Are they married? What is their spouse like? Do they own a home? Have them describe it. What type of work do they do? Why did they pick it? How many kids do they have? Having them describe their kids and the things they do together. What type of car do they own? Where do they go on vacation? … Seeing themselves differently, and dreaming about the future is the first step in getting them to work with you rather than against you toward their own future. Next, discover their Fields Of Fascination, and show them how they can get started.
2. Introduce them to people who have been in a similar situation but are now living their dream. If their dream matches your candidate’s dream, it is even better! If others can do it, so can they.
3. Introduce them to a mentor who can help them achieve their dream. (Note: If the mentor is unfamiliar with gang culture, ongoing training should be provided to them since the protocol and customs are very different from the business culture.)
4. Arrange for new experiences which broaden their view of the world and their possibilities within it. Be sure to design the experience so that they are successful, and so they feel safe trying something new.
5. Allow them to set their own pace of change. If you push too hard, their fear may take over and they will give up. You may create transitional jobs by starting your own small business or partnering with a business person willing to help these kids start a new life. These transitional jobs will allow them to learn the business culture in a more sympathetic environment. In most cases they will need to leave the gang lifestyle, before a regular employer will feel safe hiring them.
Photo by Kenny Corbin
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