What I've Learned from Hostage Negotiations

What I’ve Learned from Hostage Negotiations

Posted by Chris Webster on 5/29/09 • Categorized as Looking Around with Chris

I have a thing for negotiation and human behavior. There’s nothing like the raw human dance of motives, options and solutions that appear in hostage negotiation or psychology/sociology type situations.

I was watching a live tape of a hostage negotiation this week and one of the law enforcement people stated “The guy’s family don’t think he’s going to hurt anybody but when people get backed into a corner…you never know how they are going to react to ya.” And there’s the problem. A problem that’s repeated over and over again. In hostage negotiation there’s a very specific reason for this approach but I’ve seen the sometimes heart wrenching effects of this approach being used needlessly in every field I’ve worked in.

When backed into a corner people will, most often, do one of 2 things, fight or give up. Now in certain situations this may be exactly what you want to evoke (sports coaches commonly use this psychological tactic in training) but in others it’s completely futile.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for being an expert in a field and offering that expertise and guidance clearly to our clients, but if they feel forced to either fight with you or comply are they really actively working on their job search effectively? Chances are some in this situation are even showing a front of compliance and you may not know why they aren’t employed yet as they are fighting you tooth and nail behind your back. Add to this that with long term unemployment thoughts of justice and unfairness arise about why they aren’t hired and you face the risk of becoming one of the many faceless who continue this “injustice”.

Sometimes in our interactions with clients we have to share the bad news, to expose their barriers to them, to be honest when no one else will be; but to paint them in a corner of my way or the highway is, unless very specifically used, self defeating.
Perhaps contemplate you interaction style this week with your jobseekers:

Are they comfortable asking why they are doing some actions?
Do you present options, when appropriate, to create ownership of their job search?
From an observer’s point of view, who’s job search is really being enacted (regardless or who the job is for)? You or them?
Is it possible that your clients feel you’ve taken their choices in job searching hostage?